soapysleepy

My life n all is crannies


Leave a comment

LISTEN

 

Listen to the song here in my heart

A melody I start but can’t complete

Listen to the sound from deep within

It’s only beginning to find release

 

Oh, the time has come for my dreams to be heard

They will not be pushed aside and turned

Into your own all ’cause you won’t

Listen

 

Listen, I am alone at a crossroads

I’m not at home in my own home

And I’ve tried and tried to say what’s on mind

You should have known

 

Oh, now I’m done believing you

You don’t know what I’m feeling

I’m more than what you made of me

I followed the voice you gave to me

But now I’ve gotta find my own

 

You should have listened, there is someone here inside

Someone I thought had died so long ago

Oh, I’m screaming out and my dreams’ll be heard

They will not be pushed aside on words

Into your own all ’cause you won’t

Listen

 

Listen, I am alone at a crossroads

I’m not at home in my own home

And I’ve tried and tried to say what’s on mind

You should have known

 

Oh, now I’m done believing you

You don’t know what I’m feeling

I’m more than what you made of me

I followed the voice you gave to me

But now I’ve gotta find my own

 

I don’t know where I belong

But I’ll be moving on

If you don’t, if you won’t

 

Listen to the song here in my heart

A melody I start but I will complete

 

Oh, now I’m done believing you

You don’t know what I’m feeling

I’m more than what you made of me

I followed the voice you think you gave to me

But now I’ve gotta find my own, my own

Advertisements


Leave a comment

TO-DO TRAVELLING LIST 2015

I know we are in the middle of the year but heck yea i got plans for 2015. these plans include lots of travelling and adrenaline mind blowing activities,

For starters my trip takes me Ireland, places to check out;

1. Knowth

2. Skelling Michael

3. Dunluce Castle

4. Derry

Next up, Seoul, South Korea

And trust me, with this it’s all about the food, scenery and culture. (Need to relieve all the k. dramas n k.pops songs i’ve watched and listened to)

Tokyo, Japan

Ice cream city.

Queenstown, New Zealand

I have been told it is beautiful

Victoria Falls, Zimbabwe

For the amazeballs bungee jumping. Its 111 feet and so cool. I feel the rush just thinking about it.. Totes amazing.

So i really do i can work around the immigration guys and save shit loads on cash so i can travel and enjoy life while i can.

 

“It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop.” – Confucius


Leave a comment

Weaving of life

Image

As i scroll through pins i look at all the amazing pictures of ideas, peoples’ lives, and i get wistful and off i  go cooing at the great lives that go on out there. Am reminded that i have a desk job where i get to interview people day in and day out. People from different walks of life. Liars, cheaters, drunks and whatnot and all i can do is hide my tiny smile as i think about the rumblings going on in my head.

I look at all my friends who have got their shit together, with the lovely homes, blossoming relationships, and top notch jobs. Don’t mistake me am not jealous of what they have. Am actually glad i am the only one that hasn’t got my shit together. But at some moments i feel like i could be missing out on what they have. But then i am nudged. Scratch that. Bombarded with the voice in my head that tells me to let go and let lose.

The voice in my head tells me to travel the world. To throw my shoes away and walk bare foot in the rain screaming out lyrics of “Singing in the Rain” by Gene Kelly and Debbie Reynolds. My heart palpitates at the things i would love to do. My feet itch from anticipation for what i am oh so desiring to explore. I want to sleep on a commuter train in Tokyo, backpack across Europe. I want to learn to swim so i won’t drown when i go kayaking. I want to try out the street food on the streets of Seoul. I want to rent out a room in a hostel in Slovakia and scare myself shitless with scenes from the movie ‘Hostel’. I want to go cliff diving to dance in the alleys of Brazil and attend a Mardi Gras festival or a Coachella festival. I want to meet an traveler just like me and we share a midsummer romance.

Oh the rumblings that go on in my head as i stare out at the raging storm, the first we have had after this dry spell that has been going on forever. I want to take off my clothes and play in the rain. But then again i might have the cops called on me. *sigh*

I want to live and am trapped in the confines of life and what it dictates out to me.

Set me free, why don’t you.


Leave a comment

Story of my Life

Written in these walls are the stories that I can’t explain
I leave my heart open but it stays right here empty for days
He told me in the morning he don’t feel the same about us in his bones
Seems to me that when I die these words will be written on my stone.

 

It doesn’t seem to change. It is the same story with the same endings and the same sad sad ballads. It is an empty feeling. A deep abyss that drowns me each time i try to breathe.

I raise my eyes to the skies looking for solace but lo, i find none. Lost and trapped in the sorrow that is life and heartbreak. I s is like a song on my lips each day. A song i am sick of. A song that disgusts those around me.

A song that is like a never ending story. Day by day i trudge on. looking for some bit of comfort. A kind laugh or a kind smile,something out there to let me know that someone cares, to no avail *sigh.* It is indeed the story of my life.

 

Written on these walls are the colors that I can’t change
Leave my heart open but it stays right here in its cage
I know that in the morning now I see us in the light upon a hill
Although I am broken, my heart is untamed, still.

 

 

Image


Leave a comment

Breakeven

What am I supposed to do when the best part of me was always you?
And what am I supposed to say when I’m all choked up and you’re OK?
I’m falling to pieces.

 

The year is coming to an end. Still it is the same ole’ story. Last Christmas i gave you my heart and the very next day you gave it away. The amount of time invested the tears shed, the emotions all involved in. Washed down the drain, like an itsy bitsy spider. Something so special turned so minute. The feelings and the pain that comes with the heartbreak is overwhelming. Each day drowning in your own misery,sadness and depression. Turning pages of life to no avail. Hoping for some relief but none being present.

They say bad things happen for a reason
But no wise words gonna stop the bleeding
‘Cause he’s moved on while I’m still grieving
And when a heart breaks no it don’t break even.

What am I gonna do when the best part of me was always you?
And what am I supposed to say when I’m all choked up and you’re OK?

 

What am i gonna do when my heart is broken to pieces? I need to breathe. Breathe….Image

 

 

 


Leave a comment

Started from the bottom

It has been a long journey. A strange long one. So many hurdles and twists and turns. I’ve fallen down, broken my legs, scraped my knees. But i have gotten back to my feet. Stood up once again proud, happy, strong and in control. I have learnt from the various mistakes i have made and met in life. I have been burned, broken and scared. But i still rise up. A strong black proud woman. Ready to take the world by her horns. Ready for the challenges and mishaps in life. Ready to be a fighter, a winner and a victor. 

This is a series of stories about my life. They are in no particular order but just rumblings of how my life is depending on how i woke up feeling like and  the scars that sometimes bleed. 

SHAKE IT OUT!!!!Image